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Want to Raise Successful Kids? Science Says Praise Them Like This. (Most Parents Do the Opposite)

What if I were to tell you that you could increase the odds that your kids will achieve great successin life--maybe greater success than you've had--simply by making a small change in how youpraise them and talk about achievement? It turns out, you can. What's more, this change flies in the face of almost everything we've been told by so-called experts about raising successful kids--at least for the past 15 years or more. It's all about how we praise our kids for their accomplishments. An emerging and exciting body of research on the subject suggests several key things we might not have realized otherwise: Praising kids merely for their innate abilities, such as their intelligence, actually makes it less likely that they'll grow up to enjoy learning and to excel. Praising kids instead for the strategies and processes they develop to solve problems--even when they don't fully succeed--makes them more likely to try harder and ultimately achieve. And--perhaps the kicker--the effects of these praise strategies can be quantified even when we're talking about children as young as 1 to 3 years of age. (So once again, my 15-month-old daughter will get the benefit of something I've learned while writing for Inc.!) As you might imagine, this would mean that the so-called experts who told us to praise our kids endlessly (part of the "everyone gets a participation trophy" movement) were dead wrong. (I've written a lot this subject at Inc. and put together a free e-book: How to Raise Successful Kids.) How does it all work? We'll talk below about two studies involving school-age children, both led by Carol Dweck, a professor of psychology at Stanford University. First, however, let's examine the difference between a growth mindset and a fixed mindset,

Salespeople can Do It anywhere

I had a sales agent that overheard that we may be moving to another floor-again. Her response was ' man, all this moving, not good.' Hey, if I remember correctly, we only moved once. So what was this about? My response to her was 'what is a bigger concern in your life right now? Making commission or worrying about moving-again?' Well she kept silent, no response. It then made me come up with this thought: Sales people are choosey, but if they want to "Salespeople can do it anywhere"

Mistakes to Never Make Twice

Everybody makes mistakes — that's a given — but not everyone learns from them. Some people make the same mistakes over and over again, fail to make any real progress, and can't figure out why.      “Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them." – Bruce Lee When we make mistakes, it can be hard to admit them because doing so feels like an attack on our self-worth. This tendency poses a huge problem because new research proves something that common sense has told us for a very long time — fully acknowledging and embracing errors is the only way to avoid repeating them. Yet, many of us still struggle with this. Researchers from the Clinical Psychophysiology Lab at Michigan State University found that people fall into one of two camps when it comes to mistakes: those who have a fixed mind-set("Forget this; I'll never be good at it") and those who have a growth mind-set ("What a wake-up call! Let's see what I did wrong so I won't do it again"). "By paying attention to mistakes, we invest more time and effort to correct them," says study author Jason Moser. "The result is that you make the mistake work for you." Those with a growth mind-set land on their feet because they acknowledge their mistakes and use them to get better. Those with a fixed mind-set are bound to repeat their mistakes because they try their best to ignore them. Smart, successful people are by no means immune to making mistakes; they simply have the tools in place to learn from their errors. In other words, they recognize the roots of their mix-ups quickly and never make the same mistake twice. “When you repeat a mistake it is not a mistake anymore: it

Customer Service-The Top 10 Ways to Lose Customers

Why Not Keep Customers Instead?   Ask anyone in business about their worst customer ever and they’ll be hard-pressed to tell you about just one. But ask them about their best customer ever and they’ll probably have to take time to think about it. It’s the old 80-20 rule in action; for most people, it’s the unpleasant, nasty or outrageous that sticks in the memory. The good bits blur. Which explains why, as business people, we sometimes forget the basic truth that our customers are our biggest supporters.   Improve Grammar In Your Essays & Avoid Plagiarism. It's Fast & Easy!   They want to think well of us (and our products and services). They want us to succeed. Many of them start dealing with us in the first place hoping to become repeat customers. It makes people’s lives so much easier if they can continue to deal with one butcher or one carpet cleaner. And all they want from us is for us to meet their expectations – which means not doing any of the things in the following slides. Learn how to get and keep customers by reviewing the top ways to lose them, in reverse order from ways that will merely aggravate some of your customers through ways that will alienate all of them forever  #10) Lose customers by: Engaging poorly trained staff.   Imagine that you walk into a store selling blinds, wanting to purchase some blinds for your home. But although several different sales people seem eager to assist you, none of them seem to know anything about blinds! Imagine how frustrating that would be – and how long it would take you to walk out and take your business elsewhere. Customers, you see, have an expectation that sales people at a business will be knowledgeable about that

10 Things Emotionally Intelligent people refuse to think

Pay attention to what comes out of your mouth. The language you use affects how you experience your world, and how others experience you. Inevitably, things get "lost in translation." If you're familiar with cognitive distortion or cognitive bias, these psychology terms teach us that there are subtle ways that our mind can convince us of something that isn't really true. These inaccurate thoughts are usually used to reinforce negative thinking or emotions, thus holding us back. We all do this, both consciously and unconsciously, and how we do it provides pointers to our underlying beliefs about ourselves, our peers, partners and colleagues, and the immediate world around us. This could spell trouble. Which of these do you do? Check the areas below and be courageous enough to ask a trusted peer for perspective. Is it a problem? Top 10 Cognitive Distortions All or nothing thinking: Seeing things as black-or-white, right-or-wrong, with nothing in between. Essentially, "if I'm not perfect then I'm a failure." Examples: "I didn't finish writing that proposal so it was a complete waste of time." "There's no point in playing in that golf tournament to raise money if I'm not 100 percent in shape." "The vendor didn't show, they're completely unreliable!" Over-generalization: Using words like "always" or "never" in relation to a single event or experience. "I'll never get that promotion." "She always does that...." Minimizing or magnifying (also, catastrophizing): Seeing things as dramatically more or less important than they actually are--which can often create a "catastrophe" that follows. Examples of such inner dialogue: "Because my boss publicly thanked her, she'll get that promotion, not me (even though I had a great performance review and just won a company award)." "I forgot that email! That means my

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